monstersandmaw:

worldwithoutmiracles:

legsdemandias:

legsdemandias:

legsdemandias:

This hack will save your teeth: there are no “right” and “wrong” times to brush your teeth.

It gets in your head that you brush after eating when you wake up and when you go to sleep. Yeah that’s all well and good, but those are times that don’t have a lot of motivation and control…So just…brush your teeth at a different time. 

You go to the bathroom in the middle of the day and are like “I should brush my teeth” DO IT!!!! Don’t listen to the other half of that sentence that says “shit but it’s not the right time” 

I don’t care if you’re about to eat, or get coffee, or whatever. 

If you are there and you want to…do it. 

Honestly this hack will solve most of problems. Just stop assigning meaningless “right” and “wrong” to tasks and start saying “I can pretty much do whatever I want whenever I want and society and its expectations don’t really matter to me”. 

If there’s no barrier in the first place you don’t have to get over it. 

huge ADHD hack. if you can get over the “all or nothing”, moralizing, judging aspect of every action you “should” take, you’ll discover you can get more done than you expect.

I’m a big fan of the 2 PM shower. spend a whole morning feeling lazy and guilty, then just decide to start the day over again, even if it is lunchtime.

you can always begin again. any hour, any moment can be the beginning. you can choose that. the clock doesn’t run you, you run the clock

you can always begin again. any hour, any moment can be the beginning. you can choose that

(via enkiduofvideogames)

spectra-bear:

(via yeah-yeah-beebiss-1)

official-lucifers-child:

sentienttoast:

mysharona1987:

Guys gals non binary pals I tried so fuckin hard to find this and finally here it is

is it queer to use a different language than english?

(via demaclio)

elodieunderglass:

greekmythcomix:

pouryourselfacupoffuckrightoff:

greekmythcomix:

To explain my chicken obsession:

* * *

Me: I’m enjoying drawing chickens for this commission.

Husband: ha ha Greek Myth Chickens!

Me: 🤔

I now present to you,

🏺Greek Myth Chickens 🐓

ILIAD EDITION

1) Egg-chilles and Patro-cluck (Achilles and Patroclus)

ALT

2) Mene-lay-us and Al-eggs-andros (Paris) (Menelaus and Alexandros [Paris])

ALT

3) Egg-amemnon (Agamemnon)

ALT

4) Aph-roost-ite and Helen of Spur-ta (Aphrodite and Helen of Sparta)

ALT

5) Nest-or (Nestor)

ALT

6) Androma-beak, Peck-tor, and Astyan-egg (Andromache, Hektor and Astyanax)

ALT

7) At-hen-a and Egg-dysseus (Athena and Odysseus)

ALT

8) Preen-am and Peck-uba (Priam and Hekuba [Hekabe])

ALT

9) Brood-seis (Briseis)

ALT

10) Diom-egg-es (Diomedes)

ALT

(See next post for last 3 - https://www.tumblr.com/greekmythcomix/722218945873051648/iliad-chickens-continued-11-lay-jax-tel-capon )

Greek Myth Comix

Iliad chickens continued (from here: https://www.tumblr.com/greekmythcomix/722173151614844928/to-explain-my-chicken-obsession-me-im) 11)

Tumblr

This is exactly the kind of thing that makes this place cool. Greek Myth Chickens fuck yeah! Nest-or has me laughing out loud at work

I almost never found cool shit like this on Reddit. Here it’s everywhere. Thanks hellsite, please don’t fuck it up

This is why I joined Tumblr ❤️

Hat tip to @nessiemonster88 thank you so much!

(via todaysbird)

froginakettle:

killiel:

crtter:

crtter:

crtter:

My dad told me a Queen Elizabeth x 9/11 combo joke but idk if it works in English

It goes something like this

Q: Why can’t Americans play chess against the British anymore?

A: Because the British are missing the queen and the Americans are missing two towers (rooks).

To whoever unfollowed me for this: I didn’t even come up with the joke myself, you should unfollow my dad instead.

As a part of the Chess Fandom™️ and also from a colonized country, this was the first image I saw the day the Queen died on my whatsapp chess club group:

So yeah, that’s how the news broke to me.

an incredible update to this post

(via adhdwerewolfgf)

tigergender:

Hey. Don’t cry. “I fell in love with a lovely kitten. That kitten was myself.” and “I am happy because everyone loves me.” by Louis Wain, okay?

(via tigerexe)

pissvortex:

i always forget obama has a brother who really fucking hates him until he does stuff like this

(via adhdwerewolfgf)

were–ralph:

were–ralph:

were–ralph:

LMAO TWITTER IS REALLY TURNING PVP IM LAUGHINGGGG

FREE FOR ALL, ITEMS ON, ANY STAGES

LOL

(via shrimp-dicked-fuck-nugget)

zagreus:

cackling at this, can NOT believe it’s a real, actual quote. it reads so much like one of those clickhole pieces

(via plantbunny)

pangur-and-grim:

pangur-and-grim:

pangur-and-grim:

thinking again about the summer job I took as a teenager where a medical company wanted me to paint organs for them to use on their website (for a cutesy patient portal, where you click the organs to see symptoms associated with them), but I misunderstood and looked up surgery and autopsy photos so that I could paint the most photorealistic graphic organs possible which. they didn’t end using

I still think these slap

for everyone asking, the first organ is a prostate

(via plantbunny)

serethereal:

i have this disease called i will open your message and get distracted and forget to reply and then the notification will be gone so i will not have replied for ages and you will think i am ignoring you but. i am not. it’s incurable

(via beksboys)

jacobtheloofah:

i-was-today-years-old-when:

i learned that there’s a Japanese beetle that when eaten by a frog will haul ass through its digestive system and escape out the back end unscathed (x)

you eat me and i perfectly dodge all of your digestive enzymes and stomach acid and i sprint out your asshole fully intact

macbethz:

(via spearxwind)

iamwizzz:

(via plantbunny)

amongussexgif:

staffs-secret-blog:

Every day I learn of new unique gimmick blogs on tumblr

(via dragonmanchest)